I stole the title of today’s post from a film, both metaphorically and literally. There I’ve confessed to my crime.
I don’t know how Hitchcock would give my story a cinematic treatment, would he cast Carry Grant and Grace Kelly clad in simple chic but scruffy jeans, floppy hats and wellies, fork in hand ready to get down and dirty to dig and tend the allotment? Probably not….. I can’t see where the action lies, can you imagine the tension when Grant wants to grow Dahlias whilst Kelly wants to grow asparagus….. or the suspense of watching peas germinate and tomatoes ripen?! All with the backdrop of thefts ……Unlikely!
The Thief I’m referring to is not of the multimillionaire, south of France glamorous kind, more low-level local humdrum thievery. But theft it is. Theft is mean and miserable whether it’s priceless diamonds or humble hobbies. It bursts bubbles, nibbles away at trust. It’s like silent bullying, you can’t see the perpetrator but you see and feel the loss.
The back story? Small items, a bit of food here a few canes there gradually building up to large (8 foot) chestnut stakes and then finally onto sheer meanness. After the winter storms where the greenhouse took a fatal battering we cleared the remains and salvaged what we could, tidying the plastic glazing panels away behind the shed to reclaim in Spring and to rebuild. Picturing a Phoenix rising from the fire the greenhouse, although abjectly miserable to look at all twisted and bent out of shape could be re-built.
And re-build we did. The framework was straightened, a few new pieces made, repairs completed we turned our attention to fixing the glazing panels……. that’s when we discovered their loss. Yes somewhere out there there is a person who thinks it’s OK to go and steal greenhouse panels, no doubt to fix their own greenhouse which no doubt took an equal battering from the storms. But instead of going out and buying replacements or even making replacements from scraps and seconds they chose to steal.
Bloody ridiculous isn’t it? The theft that is, the story line if you like. A see through greenhouse is also ridiculous. I mean I can see the sea!
I know that to catch a thief you should think like one. Trust me I’ve tried and trust me when I say I can’t. I simply can’t step into their shoes, their thinking, their mindset. My brain and my heart don’t compute.
So after a hiatus where all possibilities were considered – from giving up the allotment, to moving away, abandoning gardening, to doing nothing, to retreating….. I decided to carry on. To continue to enjoy my hobby. To not be bullied off and away. Like the other thefts where crops were stolen I’ve looked for the positives or the ridiculous with anagrams (we had fun there didn’t we!) I’m turning to what I know – to grow and grow. Both metaphorically and literally.
Love Claire x